I watch the wind blow through the dry grass in the pastures and today my mind would like a spell of winter to match the landscapes outside...cold and sleeping.
This isn't the easiest season of my life and I know it. I feel sorry for myself very very often and when I make a to-do list in the morning I want to mark one big black line through it all and say "Later. That can happen later." Because you see I do have some pretty good excuses such as I'm having a rocky first trimester, am chasing after a toddler, I'm allowed only one cup of coffee a day, and have been living out of duffel bags since September. Yuck! I know you all understand.
But life was not made for later, it was made for now. Right now is when my daughter is starting to explode with words and actions that define her everyday as a growing intelligent little girl. Right now I am only an hour or so away from most my family and dearest friends. Right now is is when God will show me to have the strength to show Him in me..in the big things and the little things.
So, even though I could have spent the day on the couch or curled up beneath covers on my bed, I emerged into the world trusting God to give everything I needed to do what is right. I'm trusting Him to help me not spend the whole day in a tired heap letting my woes kill all enthusiasm.
Oh, but I'll reward myself later for cleaning, doing errands, and completing tasks. I just made an apple cake and I think tonight I might watch a sitcom, drink some warm spiced cider, and eat some cake. Just because life is for now. It is not for later.
Thank you, God for giving me strength to live in the now.
Photo by Joyosity
There is a time for everything,
and a season for every activity under the heavens:
a time to be born and a time to die,
a time to plant and a time to uproot,
a time to kill and a time to heal,
a time to tear down and a time to build,
a time to weep and a time to laugh,
a time to mourn and a time to dance,
a time to scatter stones and a time to gather them,
a time to embrace and a time to refrain from embracing,
a time to search and a time to give up,
a time to keep and a time to throw away,
a time to tear and a time to mend,
a time to be silent and a time to speak,
a time to love and a time to hate,
a time for war and a time for peace.