It happened all day long. My little girl would stop playing, come find me and lift up her arms. Her toddler babble informed me that she wanted a hug, but with my twins in my tummy taking up all my lap space I couldn't hardly lift her up for a cuddle. She didn't mind. I would sit on the floor or invite her up to the couch with me and she'd fall across into my arms in just a way that we were both comfortable. And she stayed and stayed.
Of course, my mind would race with worries. Is she sick? Why isn't she playing? Should I be doing this? Am I spoiling her?
Oh, but in my heart of hearts I knew a great truth--she needed this. She needed to be held, to be hugged and kissed, and reassured for whatever reason. And each time I held her I knew by the way my shoulders relaxed and my eyes closed blissfully, that I needed it too. Holding her felt so right, a balm for my hurts and for whatever she feels she is missing these days.
I forget her life has taken a tumble too. I've been sick, I've left her with her grandparents for a whole fortnight. When I got her back she was enrolled in daycare and I have to let others do most things for her such as bathe, dress, and cook for her. When she comes to my arms I can feel that her natural instinct is to find that reassurance. And, as her mother, that is probably one of my favorite jobs.
I know that as parents we worry about spoiling our children. We want to guide them to independence, good manners, and respect for others. It is a tough, tough job. But I also know that just as in every other aspect of our lives, the Holy Spirit guides us in how we take care of these little souls entrusted to us. So often I pray, God, am I doing right by my daughter? Is this the way? And if I listen to His voice I know the answer. Yes, parenthood is a road full of discipline, providing good examples, and making sure our children are prepared to succeed in this world. But parenthood is first and foremost an act of love. Everything we do for them, from time-outs to putting an extra half-cookie on their plates, is something we do out of an unconditional love.
Therefore, yes, I have permission to cuddle, hold, and reassure my daughter as much as her heart desires. Who knows, maybe she needs a few days of this to feel steady again on her feet. It is one of the few things I can do for her and I'm so thankful to have a precious daughter to fill my aching arms these days.
Of course, my mind would race with worries. Is she sick? Why isn't she playing? Should I be doing this? Am I spoiling her?
Oh, but in my heart of hearts I knew a great truth--she needed this. She needed to be held, to be hugged and kissed, and reassured for whatever reason. And each time I held her I knew by the way my shoulders relaxed and my eyes closed blissfully, that I needed it too. Holding her felt so right, a balm for my hurts and for whatever she feels she is missing these days.
I forget her life has taken a tumble too. I've been sick, I've left her with her grandparents for a whole fortnight. When I got her back she was enrolled in daycare and I have to let others do most things for her such as bathe, dress, and cook for her. When she comes to my arms I can feel that her natural instinct is to find that reassurance. And, as her mother, that is probably one of my favorite jobs.
I know that as parents we worry about spoiling our children. We want to guide them to independence, good manners, and respect for others. It is a tough, tough job. But I also know that just as in every other aspect of our lives, the Holy Spirit guides us in how we take care of these little souls entrusted to us. So often I pray, God, am I doing right by my daughter? Is this the way? And if I listen to His voice I know the answer. Yes, parenthood is a road full of discipline, providing good examples, and making sure our children are prepared to succeed in this world. But parenthood is first and foremost an act of love. Everything we do for them, from time-outs to putting an extra half-cookie on their plates, is something we do out of an unconditional love.
Therefore, yes, I have permission to cuddle, hold, and reassure my daughter as much as her heart desires. Who knows, maybe she needs a few days of this to feel steady again on her feet. It is one of the few things I can do for her and I'm so thankful to have a precious daughter to fill my aching arms these days.
Love is patient. Love is kind.
1 Corinthians 13:4
Photo by familymwr via flickr
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